Entry #59

Entry #59

Monday, April 23

1:30 p.m. I just read an article from the Sunday New York Times that reveals a scary truth about modern society. It’s entitled “The Flight From Conversation:”

“We live in a technological universe in which we are always communicating. And yet we have sacrificed conversation for mere connection.

At home,  families sit together, texting and reading email. At work, executives text during board meetings. We text (and shop and go on Facebook) during classes and when we’re on dates...We’ve become accustomed to a new way of being ‘alone together.’”

There’s a similar article in this month’s Atlantic Monthly that discusses the fact that while there’s more communications technology than ever before, we’ve never been more lonely.

“We are living in an isolation that would have been unimaginable to our ancestors, and yet we have never been more accessible. Over the past three decades, technology has delivered to us a world in which we need not be out of contact for a fraction of a moment...We live in an accelerating contradiction: the more connected we become, the lonelier we are. We were promised a global village; instead we inhabit the drab cul-de-sacs and endless freways of a vast suburb of information.”—The Atlantic

I literally live in a cul-de-sac. Near endless freeways. I also spend a great many hours alone, not so much because I’m antisocial, but because even when I go out, there simply aren’t many people outside (their cars or homes), unless they're out shopping. A realtor we know said, “There just aren’t a lot of people around.” What’s odd about this is that The Woodlands’ population is booming. You’d just wouldn't know it by looking around the neighborhoods.

This month’s Real Simple magazine urges people to reach out to their moms this Mother’s Day, citing that hearing their mother’s voice actually reduces stress, while emailing just doesn’t cut it.


"Researchers found that talking to Mom on the phone lowers stress levels, but chatting with her online does not. The theory is that it's the sound of her voice that's calming, not what she says (but no need to worry Mom with that detail)..." —Real Simple

The Woodlands was designed to be a suburban utopia of sorts (suburtopia? subopia?)—with kid-friendly cul-de-sacs, grassy front yards, walking paths and public parks. This place was planned down to the last marigold. Perhaps if the air conditioning and wireless broke down every now and then, we'd see one another more. Sprawling front porches would be a great idea, too.

Tuesday, April 24

10: 45 a.m. After school yesterday we baked brownies with the student who has devoted herself to being a vegetarian for the remainder of the school year despite the fact that she will not eat most vegetables or fruits, and craves bacon and steak. Still, her devotion hasn’t waivered. (Ironically, her name is Faith.) 

While waiting for the brownies to bake, I served some fresh raspberries and clementines. Faith hesitantly sampled one raspberry, while Noah and Aidan inhaled the rest. Getting this girl to eat fruit and veggies—even potatoes—is nearly impossible. Hence, the brownies. Her recent birthday was a fine excuse to resort to something sweet.

I took Faith back home and then began cooking dinner. Aidan had been wiggling yet another loose tooth, then ran into the kitchen with a bloody mouth. “I think I pulled it out before it was ready,” he said, rinsing his mouth out in the sink. I had him bite down on a cold, wet rag, then went to get him an ice cube. Only thing was, there were no ice cubes. We did have some frozen fruit, however, so I grabbed the first thing I could find—a large frozen strawberry. “At least it’s the same color!” Aidan said, stuffing it in the gap that minutes ago held a baby molar.

Chomping on his strawberry, Aidan wandered outside with Izzie. Just as I was beginning to cook dinner, he yelled, “Mom! Come quick! Izzie has something disgusting in her mouth!” I called Izzie and she ran inside, though a bit too stealthily. Her mouth wasn’t bulging with anything, so I figured that whatever she’d had in her mouth was dropped outside. Still, I followed her as she trotted to the spot where she takes special treats, namely the off-white rug that was just cleaned last week. 

Izzie opened her mouth and deposited something on the floor. I walked closer to get a better look and saw a newborn bird, faintly breathing and completely unharmed on the floor. I got a paper towel and scooped it up. It took another breath, then died in my hand.

While we were eating dinner, Aidan commented how glad he was that we didn’t have chicken that night. I think it’ll be awhile before I can consume poultry again.

After dinner, my brother-in-law Eric called to tell us (jokingly) that he was sending Teddy, the puppy we fostered, back our way. Apparently Teddy had pooped in his shoe. “I think he has something against males,” said David, recalling an incident where he found a steamy pile from Teddy beneath his office chair, but only after stepping in it. “He wants to be top dog.”

Eric maintained his sense of humor about this and even sent us a photo. The email read: Teddy: Round One. I reassured Eric that the ball (or rather, balls) will in his court soon after Teddy gets neutered. I have the feeling that the reduced testosterone might curb Teddy’s desire to fill shoes with something that smells even worse than Eric’s hot, sweaty feet.

2:30 p.m. According to today's Huffington Post, Lunchables are listed among the most processed foods out there. Noah and Aidan have told me that a lot of kids at their school bring Lunchables every day, even though the school provides a hot lunch. Aidan reasons that it’s in part because the food’s not all that enticing, but moreso because “kids around here love meat and the lunches at school are vegetarian.” Seems the cold cuts in Lunchables are not so much actual meat as meat by-products:


“While we’re all for eating nutritious, whole foods whenever possible, we also know the reasons you reach for that frozen pizza or those pre-made veggie patties...Still it’s easy to be fooled by labels and packaging making false health claims or hiding sneaky unhealthy ingredients...To start, look for ‘foods with ingredients we know, recognize, can situate in some part of the plant or animal kingdom, and can pronounce,’ writes David Katz, Director of the Yale Prevention Research Center. It’s also a good idea to avoid foods with more than five ingredients; ...additional [ones] are often preservatives, sugars and other additives, many of which we can’t even digest properly.”—Huffington Post


While the Ham + American Cracker Stackers appears to be a simple snack of cheese, ham and crackers with a “juice drink,” it actually contains more than 61 ingredients. It's more like a science experiment resembling food—faux food, if you will. It may very well survive unscathed in a time capsule, so there are some long-term benefits of this reconstituted, chemically altered food product. You might as well eat a Twinkie, a veritable health food in comparison, with a mere 39 ingredients.

4:30 p.m. Noah’s hoping to take an accelerated art course next year, though, like everything else around here, the competition is intense. While the ninth grade campus was fairly empty (school had already let out), I got a glimpse of what it would be like to be in a school of 1050 ninth graders just by walking throught the cavernous cafeteria. Even without the critical masses, I felt overwhelmed. I sure hope the kids fare better in crowds than I do.

I had to wait for Noah’s “free sketch” (i.e., art test) for about a half hour, so I decided to take a walk around the area. Before crossing the street, a car pulled out from the high school driveway. This car, a small white sedan, would be unremarkable if not for the eyelashes on its headlights. I’d seen Rudolph antlers and bright red noses, but until today, I’d never seen a car with eyelashes. Seems somehow fitting for The Woodlands, where every magazine, newspaper and shopping center offers countless ways to improve, augment, or otherwise aesthetically enhance your exterior.


Apparently, Car Lashes® (already trademarked) is "THE leading supplier of female automotive aftermarket products." For $26.99, you, too, can give your car a feminine touch. Or, if you'd like a tad more sparkle, you can add a strip of "Diamond Crystal Eyeliner." But wait, that's not all! Take your car to the next level of bedazzlement by adhering Twinkles to your license plates, wheel rims or dashboard, then top it off with a Crystal License Plate Frame. Sunglasses highly recommended (to prevent blindness from an oncoming rhinestone-studded car).